Jacob was totally worth it

The following post recounts a series of unfortunate events... It is entirely true and could probably serve as a warning.

So last night I went down to FHE for Mr. SM3(Santa Monica Third Ward). Hilarious. If I had the mind to take pictures I would have. There was a talent portion, evening wear and pick up lines. Two personal favs of the night... (warning: one is like uber Mormon and the other is uber not). The first one was "Is your name Virtue? Because you have been garnishing my thoughts unceasingly" the second one was "Is that a mirror in your pants? Because I think I see my self in them"

Afterwards I got invited to see this little indie movie, staring a bunch of no names about Vampires. It's called New Moon, maybe you have heard of it? I went with a friend who shall remain nameless for the fact that it would damage his masculinity, as well as the fact that he is the one that wanted to see it, and that...

wait for it.... he loves the movies.

So as we are leaving the church parking lot I think to myself, "you know you should move your car, they might lock up the parking lot."

"Pah!" I said back to myself. Why would I listen to such astute and sound advise? I just stuffed that "still small whisper" in my back pocket and started getting excited about seeing Jacob and his shirtless glory.

It took forever to find the theater mainly because it was in a strip mall and was the size of a Jamba Juice. Now let me paint a picture for you: There are approximately 10 people in the theater. We pick a seat in the middle of the middle. There are still plenty of seats. Then this crew of kids in odd clothes comes and sits..... right next to me! I look around... yep there are still at least 100 seats left including more seats in our row. But no, they came and sat down right next to me. After a few minutes they started and speaking and low and behold it was the beautiful language of love.... German!

Duh!

Of course it was! Of course they were! Germans love putting unsuspecting people in confined spaces. It's like kinda what they excelled at for a number of years.

The shocker of the evening was that I actually like loved the movie. Like really really loved it. It could be because Jacob represents all that is right in the world or could be because Edward was hardly in it at all... which meant that he and Bella had less of a chance to have awkward, breathing, staring moments with each other.

So we get back to the church and

the parking lot is locked. Like all three gates and even the gate for pedestrians.

Hmm that's weird. Pretty sure I knew I should have moved my car. Pretty sure I heard in my head "Amanda move your freakin car!" Pretty sure I didn't heed such advise. So at 12:45 at night my friend Robert, had to drive me all the way back home and then back. Yikes.

Now as I was getting out of his car, I thought "you should make sure you have your car keys" Oh please, like I even needed my car key. I didn't have my car. Why would I want to check for them? Why would I actually listen to that little voice inside.

So as I am getting ready to have my dad take me into work today, I realize.... drum roll please.... I DON'T HAVE MY CAR KEY!!!!

Well of course I don't have it! I left it in Robert's car. I mean it was only natural for me to continue to make bone-headed decisions.

So today included: Robert taking my key to the car, my dad driving by to move my car from the parking lot (which was finally unlocked), my dad driving back to work, then me and my dad driving back down Santa Monica and getting my car and then driving all the way back. Oh and did I mention that there was traffic almost the whole way down there and the whole way back?

All day today I have been thinking, "What am I supposed to learn from this?" Here is what I have come up with

1. That little voice is not my imaginary friend but just a close friend who likes to tell me things and hopes that I will learn to listen.

2. I have the best dad in the whole world. You might think your dad is the "World's Best Dad.", but mine actually is. I actually already knew that, but it was reaffirmed to me today.

And so even though today and last night were super stressful and I was ready to chuck something at anyone who crossed my path today.....

Jacob was totally worth it.

Dear swine flu,

Once upon a time I thought you might be kinda fun to have. From what people were telling me about you, you mainly were just a sore throat and a cough.

Jackpot! I love a sore throat and a cough. So I thought, hmm... swine flu you and I might wanna hang out sometime. It would give me a sore throat and that always means a sexy voice to follow and let's be honest that it's never a bad thing to have a sexy voice.

But you tricked me.

Not only are you a sore throat and cough, but you also are dizziness, nausea, a runny nose, a stuffy nose, a headache, the chills, and a super annoying fever.

So I think we are going to need to break up. Because you are like ruining what little social life I had and are kinda getting on my nerves.

With no love what-so-ever,

Amanda

First Research Paper on Gray's

So in the Winter of 2003 I took this class called Infant Development at BYU. We were required to to write research paper on something related to infants.... it could be anything. I detest research papers. I think that they are beyond lame. I did what I usually did and picked the most obscure topic imaginable.

It was about this method called Kangaroo Care. I picked it because all the research was done in like Romanian and translated and I thought my professor wouldn't have ever heard of it and so he couldn't give me a bad grade for saying or quoting something incorrectly, because he won't even know it was incorrect.

It is not really practiced in the US, but they do it a lot in middle eastern countries and eastern Europe. Basically they take babies who are in the NICU and have the mom's hold the babies against their bare chests. It helps the babies learn to self regulate and it helps them to thrive in an un-thrive-able situation, a cold bed hooked up to monitors and tubes.

Well I got a C+ on it, which was fine. I didn't really give a rats. My mom refers to it as "the most boring paper ever." Well low and behold it was on Gray's last night.

"When the baby’s fate seemed sealed, Alex's tenderness reappeared and he held her and assured her she wasn’t alone. His technique, the kangaroo hold, kick started her system. Bailey explained it often worked better with skin-to-skin contact, so he spent the rest of the episode shirtless. "

I knew that I liked Kangaroo Care.

The case of the perverted spider

If there was a website for registered human offenders, that guy would on it.

Why you might ask?

Oh because I am pretty sure that he is the perverted spider that has been biting me.

But spiders can't be perverted you say, they aren't human.

Well the spider that has been biting me as of late, has one dirty, evil little mind. Not only do I have bites where the sun does not shine, but he has created what appears to be a third nipple.

Now that might be graphic or inappropriate for a forum such as this, but I had to get the word out there about this devilish creature.

As of today I have 11 bites.

I have washed all my sheets, vacuumed my mattress, showered incessantly, washed all my towels, and vacuumed the couches, but to no avail.

The bites itch like no other, which is super awkward, esp. given their unforunate locations and how in this society reaching your hand under your clothing at anytime is not socially acceptable. Oh and on top of that, they then hurt after they done itching. They also remain redish even after the pain and itching subsides.

So does anyone have a rememdy? Or know what could be causing this? Or want to start a website for evil spiders? I am up for any and all suggestions

Beckoning Autumn...

For the past week I have been trying to will Autumn to come. Sometimes when I proclaim things like " 85, Sunny and Laying Out" what I really mean is, I hate this weather. That sort of temperature situation is fine for summer, heck it's even enjoyable in the summer, but come fall... it has to go.

I was looking at my dear friend Jamie's blog and I instantly became more melancholy for the harvest season. To me, she just embodies everything that is wonderful and lovely about the fall time. Not to mention her change of location to the Northeast, where they practically invited the Autumn Harvest.

As such I have been speaking incessantly about the Harvest Season to my mother.

To start off the fall season I went to Anthro and purchased this little gem.

It's a Pumpkin Ginger Pound Cake Candle. When I lived in the blue house, aka the Princess House, I knew that fall had arrived when we would go and purchase our Salt City Candles in wonderfully aromatic fall scents. This little sucker did just the trick.

Today was the first day that felt like fall. It never got above 78 and there was a chill in the breeze that had been missing the day before. As such I went outside and did what any other self-respecting fall-lover would do... I picked apples. My mom has this great little apple tree in the backyard that doesn't look like much, but it produces the most beautiful apples that are perfect for baking.

I made this little doozy.

It's an apple oven cake. The "cake" aspect is basically like a German Pancake and then you cook the apples in cinnamon, sugar and butter until they soften. It was just what the Dr. ordered.

Also today in an effort to help my mom liven up the front yard I planted some lovely fall colored flowers.

She had dug up this little planter the day before and I suggested that we plant colors of the season.

Before:

After:

I am so envious of everyone in the Northeast, Northwest and Utah that get to experience the leaves turning and the slow arrival of fall.

I think it's supposed to be 90 tomorrow... oh well... it was fun while it lasted.

Don't adjust your screen

This is not an optical illusion...

I just got new car.

Well I actually got it on the 14th, but I am slow to blog for some reason. I might have computer mono, I just can't seem to muster the energy to pull myself away from my mom for two seconds to come sit by myself on the computer.

Interesting facts about this car:

It has a working radio.

It has working air conditioning.

The front headlights are not falling out.

My seats are in-tack.

My side mirrors are not being held up by tape.

The paint is not oxidized down to the metal on the car.

Overall, I would say it is a pretty big improvement on the last car I had.

Only down side.... payments...

A night with Speidi...

Alas, Spencer and Heidi were not spotted at Don Antonio's.

But I was.

My friend Robert and I decided that we were going to eat at all the places where the Hills have filmed, so the natural first choice was Don Antonio's. It was pretty great. The first time we went was dollar taco night and the wait was over an hour and forty-five so we didn't stay. But this time there was no wait and we got right in. I didn't take a picture of the outside patio where we ate because I didn't want to be one of those people who are only there because of Spencer "I don't get volunteer, I get paid" Pratt and Heidi. But I found a picture of a similar patio online so you can get the idea:

I had the carne asada and it was delicious. I had spotted several people ordering it and eating it the first time we went and it looked delish. Again I didn't take a picture of the food, for fear of being "that girl"

On an unrelated side note, the lady sitting next to us was talking about Rachel Zoe and being on her show?! I die!!! I am hoping that given our location, this rather plump, wild haired woman will actually be one the show and she wasn't just talking about celebrities like she knows them like me.

If you are not listening to the new Miley Cyrus song "Party in the USA" then you should download it and listen to it on repeat. It might change your life. I am pretty sure that mine was changed.

Oh and another thing. I am obsessed with the new season of 90210. Last season was ok, but the season opener the other night?! Bananas! It was what the show should be about: affairs, teen sex romps, more affairs, hit and run accidents, you know just typical teenage life.

Also I think I might be loving Melrose Place.

I would like to take this moment to express my love and gratitude to Direct TV and my DVR. With out I don't know where I would be.